The Conversation

I'm so conflicted on whether I should message this girl I met that I'm crushing on. I feel like there's a non-zero chance that she might feel similarly, and it will eat me alive if I go the rest of my life wondering if she actually does feel the same way with no clear answer. But I also have horrible luck with these things, and I'm no longer interested in losing the few friends I have by accidentally coming across as weird or too up-front, and getting rejected. The last time I tried this it was a horrible disaster that amplified my depression for months. And even if this did work out, it'd be such long distance that there's no way it'd work out in the long run - I'm talking continents apart. Fuck I don't know what to do