WHY THE FUCK do mosquitoes even exist?! Like what purpose do they serve besides RUINING EVERY SINGLE NIGHT OF MY LIFE?! I'm just trying to sit outside for FIVE MINUTES, enjoy a breath of air, and BAM theyre already feasting on me like I’m the goddamn buffet special. And it’s always the ankles. The ankles!! Why?! Why go for the most inconvenient, impossible-to-scratch spot? And don’t even get me started on that high-pitched buzzing in your ear at 2am. That tiny demon is basically saying, “Hey bitch, I’m here to fuck your whole night up.” And the second you turn on the light? Vanished. Houdini with wings. Then you’re up slapping walls like you’re in a one-man exorcism.
I spray myself with repellent, burn citronella, wear long sleeves in 97 degree weather and STILL they find a way. Absolute bloodsucking, disease-spreading parasites. They’re basically flying syringes with no purpose except to annoy, infect, and itch. Honestly, if there was a button to nuke the entire mosquito species off the planet, I’d smash it so hard I’d break my goddamn hand.
#Hiking #BitchAssMFuckers
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