The Conversation

You know it’s hard enough dealing with an abusive mother. It’s even harder when she puts on a charade and everyone thinks that I’M the bad kid, even going as far as sympathizing for her having to put up with me. All I want is the satisfaction of the truth emerging for all to see, an end to the senseless denial, and a fucking nap. And I was getting close to that - well, at least the first part…

Then she ends up with cancer. Metastasizing to the brain. Two to three months to live. I’m fine with that, believe me. Sure I feel bad for her when I’m icing my own welts and burns and I think about how she went through the same shit with her mom… but if she wont start telling the truth and admitting to what she’s done then I won’t have any part of a relationship with her - and I shouldn’t fucking HAVE to. Everyone goes on and on with the “You have to learn to forgive…” and “It’ll just bring you down, I mean, she’s your MOM!”

Well what the fuck am I supposed to forgive if she’s “done nothing wrong”? Hmm? And by the way; when was it decided that when someone dies or is dying that they become martyrs with no mistakes and an all-express pass to do whatever the fuck they want? Cause if that’s the case, then sign me the fuck up for some heroine and methamphetamines. Maybe I can trash my organs into destruction and faultlessly screw up the life of another human being.