GOD Damn it. I feel like the absolute worst person on the planet right now.
I have to stop this. I need to get a grip on my emotions and stop hurting everyone around me. This isn't okay.
What is something you have been holding inside?
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I cannot wait til I fucking die. I can't wait to be away from this fucker. Cause that's truly the only out is him or me dying. I wished he'd divorced me when I didn't want to have kids. I hate myself endlessly when I'm with him. But actual suicide would take effort so all I can do is swallow my self loathing and wait.