What is one thing that needs to change?

honestly i dont even know anymore. i feel selfish for even saying it but i just want out. i want to stop everything. i wanna drop out of uni for a year or forever idc anymore. i work every damn weekend too like when the hell do i even get to be alive? i’m 17 and all i do is school and work and i feel like i’m 40 already. everyone says “you’ll thank yourself later” but later feels like death to me. i want right now.

why the fuck did my dad just leave us like that. who does that. drops us in some falling apart house and then dangles foreclosure like a knife every time we breathe wrong. he’d say it just to keep us scared. every time we talked about leaving he’d threaten us. now the house is literally rotting. friends dying, friends overdosing, fights, accidents, like everything around me crumbling. i keep telling myself one day i’ll stop this cycle somehow but what power do i even have. i’m just one fucking person screaming into the void.

god help me im dying over here. i said i’d do this stupid no contact thing with my boyfriend and it’s only been like 4 DAYS and i’m cracking already. i miss him so bad i feel like my chest is gonna split. why does it have to hurt like this? why can’t we just go back to 2 years ago when it was actually good, before the fights and the bullshit. he’s the one, like i don’t want anyone else, i don’t even LOOK at anyone else. why can’t he just fix the little shit he does that drives me insane? why is it always me hurting and begging for him to see it?? i hate this so much i want him back but i also hate that i want him.

I’m stuck with this girl I swear I love her and hate her at the same time. I wanna be close to her but sometimes I can’t even stand her touch, like my skin crawls. We fight about every damn thing. And the worst part is I know she’s manipulative as hell, it’s not like a “bad habit,” it’s literally her personality, baked in. She pulls strings like it’s air to her. And yet there’s this weird piece of her that’s got a good heart and she knows she’s selfish and wants to be better, and I hold onto that like an idiot. But wanting to change isn’t the same as changing. She’s still controlling, still explosive, still her. And I don’t know how the hell to get out. I feel like I’m choking but also terrified to breathe without her.

Also, entertainment, that we really don't need vitally to survive, unlike food and shelter along with job, but people use to rightfully pass time and get away from it all, that shit is rising, rising, rising, like $60, $70, I think one being close to $100 a month!! For just ONE FUCKING ANIME/ENTERTAINMENT STREAMING COMPANY????!!!!!!!!!!! Naw man, get that shit for FREE!!!!!!!! It's not like you pay the animators great wages. I think migrants working the fields get better pay than they do!!!!

I'm more so, ashamed for the fucking entitlement of Youtubers. I just watched a nice, free full episode of One Piece, the most recent episode on my phone. Which is a bit big, but I'm not one for enormous size like 80" or shit like that. I don't need to see every fucking pixel. I guess that's thanks to homelessness which made me grateful for shit normies wouldn't, like being able to fully sleep instead of one eye open. But then people hate the quality. WATCH THE DAMNED VIDEO AND BE QUIET!!!

Just because someone got hurt is like celebrating collateral damage when a shooter hits someone uninvolved and saying well, they deserved it when their only situation was their unfortunate luck. So it wasn't truth hurts. Lies do as well. It was taking it out on those uninvolved towards that group attack which was unnecessarily poisoning the well. But since this rant characteristic reads like you, and you kept it in rules, I decided as respect and also rule following to do the same.

The woman who said it was overwhelming I side with her because you were quite intense and I guess I added on despite me trying to lower the temperature by saying logically you're right but that stopped when you did all of them. Further, no one will care about you if you come at them offensively, ie snarkily, when they're giving constructive advice. No one has lived the life you did so they can't be asked to sympathize 100% with you. Just because it's not 100% doesn't mean it's automatically 0%.

Though as stated before, I'm more happy than annoyed, it is still annoying I got caught up in your anti rant towards a group there, even if it was rationally justified. It stopped though when it was broad brushed which I was trying to get you to see. Further, glad to see another person knows about the 9 circles of hell from the Divine Comedy with the author you cited. Anyway, you said some main points i want to touch and didn't want to respond to each one so this would do. Coming up now.

AHH!! IT IS YOU!!! The, for purposes here, now ruled against and just as much of a describer as possible, the f-anon! I remember giving you morally gray advice so you wouldn't have to put up with it because that's what I do with ALOT of added benefits than just the purposed one, and, well, it led to the peach box here with the new rule that truthfully, you did and I as usual got caught up to say that just like with any group, you can't broad brush all of them, it's not justice at all.